A non-user’s thoughts on social media
I like to say I don’t use social media. I rarely do. Where it’s useful, I have temporary accounts that I trash ever so often. But I’ve spent time on most forms of social media as a silent consumer and I have some thoughts.
1. So much everything
People talk a lot. What I would consider mental noise that had little place in a real-life interaction is here, everywhere, in its unfiltered glory. I can hear what some people are thinking, and it is amazing and terrifying at the same time. There are so many things being said that you would never get to listen to in real life (for better or for worse).
That also means silence isn’t supported. Lulls, time outs and pauses for reflection are antithetical features: they go against the purpose of the app. Imagine yourself going into interconnected rooms of social conversation with no exit. That’s what it feels like, becoming more and more lost in social media.
2. Market yourself
Social media is content-first. Aside from your posts, your profile is the next important thing everyone sees. It’s where you sum up yourself, highlights and all, the frictionless alternative of a self-introduction in real life. Some include their red lines because all social circles have boundaries.
This self-categorization makes everything faster, the deliberation, selection and filtering involved. What would usually require several interactions and input from others occurs in seconds online. Some people treat their profiles as badges of pride.
3. Desire is currency
Social media is built on desire. I don’t think the nature of its charged interactions can exist without it, because desire and envy keep people from coming back to the app.
While people do relate to each other on social media, the main undercurrent still is: how does this translate to what I want? People have different desires (virtuous, material, or other) and the most successful creators leverage the loudest and unspoken ones. Desire isn’t a complete reflection of society, but it is for social media.
4. The quiet is the scariest
Experiences on social media can be a hit or miss. But once you’re invested in it, there isn’t a separation that isn’t painful. The labyrinth of desire and emotion that you’ve gotten used to visiting every day will one day not have what you want. You will keep senselessly scrolling. In the quiet, you will realize that you don’t know what you want.
You can’t explain why. You want something, but you have no idea how to find it. That feeling of powerlessness is a horror.
Anyway. I probably am using social media incorrectly. It’s likely that for most, their experiences are not going to be a speedrun of these things. Perhaps the social media of today isn’t for me, someone who spends more time hesitating over their words than pressing the Submit button.